One Small Step
Pictured above: Dr. Pfister’s son, Trent, graduates from the New York Conservatory for Dramatic Arts
As the saying goes, “April showers bring May flowers.” But May also holds the fine distinction as being the month of the greatest change in most of our lives…
What am I referring to, you may ask?
The culmination of 13 years of maturing, learning, socializing, and… for most of us… experimenting on how to fit in. And no matter what direction we will choose after May, this most developmental chapter of our lives will have its final page turned on that ceremonious event called Graduation Day.
As the graduate walks across the stage with a backdrop of elated cheers from family and friends, the importance of the event is captured in the poignant tears of parents, as they feel their child slipping away. Living surrounded by a large extended family, I have witnessed more than my share of graduations and, having graduated four times myself (high school, undergrad, dental school, and orthodontic school), I’ve made a few observations that I would like to share.
I have always felt that the Graduation stage itself, most parents of graduating children would agree, could be viewed as a mystical one-way bridge from childhood to adulthood.
Once crossed, there is no going back. One may not act like an adult after receiving the diploma, but one is expected to! Webster defines the word commencement as, “a beginning, or a start;” and whether we admit it or not, once across the stage with diploma in-hand, even the most unemotional among us feels strangely different. Gone is our total naivety or innocence and we are now moving toward the world of responsibility and self-reliance.
Rephrasing Neil Armstrong’s moon quote, Graduation Day can be viewed as “one small step for mankind; one giant leap for the Graduate.” We had 13 years, including kindergarten, to prepare and be ready; but when the day finally arrives, look most graduates in the eyes, you will find a lot of deer-in–the-headlights stares looking back.
Most would agree high school had its ups and downs… from boring to exciting… but there was always that safety net feel with your teachers and principals, that if everything failed, they would help you solve your dilemma. The world, especially today, has far fewer safety nets and the fall can be fatal. The saying, “What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger” has some validity; but the taste of independence is sweet and provides the drive to propel the next generation to be successful.
The definition of success means many different things to many different individuals…
Success for my parents’ generation was to work at Ford or Chevy. Mom stayed home and dad worked. It was all very simple — don’t let grandma and grandpa kid you.
My generation found so much success in going to college, that we were sure the same formula would work for our kids. So we pushed them through the doors of higher education; and several degrees later (not to mention a small fortune in tuition) employment and happiness seemed more like a Disney fairy tale than a reality.
After working with high school seniors over the last 38 years, one fact seems to stand out — if the student doesn’t want to go to college or trade school, don’t force them! Boys especially, need time to mature and wrap their heads around who they really are and what their strengths and weaknesses are. I pushed both of my boys to college and they have eventually found themselves; but neither are doing anything that vaguely looks like what they received their first degrees in.
The female seniors I have worked with have always been more mature and more realistic about their future endeavors. And today’s women have so many more opportunities and success mentors than ever before. Many European countries have a two-year military requirement before their males can apply for college or trade schools. My wife doesn’t agree, but I think it would put the world into better focus for many of our males and give them a hire-able skill (paid for by Uncle Sam) if they served our country before choosing a career.
Success should not be measured by the size of the paycheck, the car in the garage, or where the garage is located; it should lie in one’s heart and in the feeling at the end of the day, that the world is just a wee bit better place because of what I did today.
Now, let us give congratulations where it is due.
Class of 2022, congratulations on a superb performance during one of the most difficult times for the human race in modern times. You did it! You stuck to your mission, you completed the task before you, you had to Zoom at times, mask at times, quarantine at times, vaccine at times… but through it all, you persevered and conquered!
You are a success and that is no small feat in today’s world. Your diploma is a symbolic statement that shows if you put your mind to it, you can do anything you want (within reason) and be anyone you want.
But Graduate, remember, as you walk off that stage and onto the stage of life, it is your responsibility to develop your special skill set and go out into the world and make it a better place. Nobody owes you anything. You are not entitled to anything. But you can work and you can achieve incredible success. It’s your life and your responsibility!
On behalf of my Family and Staff, I would like to personally congratulate all of our Medina County Graduates and wish you the ability to hang in there when the going gets tough, the desire to make this world a better place, and the love of a family to support you through it all!
Warm wishes for a bright future ahead,
Dr. Pfister